


A conversation can go a long way

by nearingexistence



Category: King Falls AM (Podcast)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, I really tried to only write fluff but angst decided to pepper itself in, Nonbinary Ben Arnold, Platonic Cuddling, Trans Ben Arnold, Trans Character, and because they deserve it, it's all platonic y'all, lots of hugs and cuddles because I can, not a lot of angst though I swear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:27:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26538079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nearingexistence/pseuds/nearingexistence
Summary: Sammy introduces "non-binary" into Ben's vocabulary and it rocks his world.
Relationships: (background) Ben Arnold/Emily Potter, Ben Arnold & Sammy Stevens
Comments: 3
Kudos: 37





	A conversation can go a long way

**Author's Note:**

> My take on what could've happened based on episode 84 when Sammy starts saying "guys, gals, and non-binary pals"

It was a typical night at the King Falls AM radio station. The Sammy and Ben show was well underway, the boys discussing the happenings around town, as well as the possibility that their new equipment might be affected by more strange technical difficulties.

“That is why we have the computer science scientist, Jim Jiminen—Jimininin—“

“Jim Jimineninsky,” Sam corrected fondly.

Ben waved his hand in exasperation. “Yeah, _him_ calling in to talk to us in like 40 or so.”

“Right.”

“So until then, let’s take some calls.”

“Alright, guys, gals, and non-binary pals,” Sammy said, relaxing into his chair. “You’ve heard our story tonight, let’s hear yours. Give us a call at—“

“Did you just,” Ben interrupted. “Did you say ‘non-binary pals’?”

Sammy tilted his head. “What? Yeah.”

“It’s just _new_. Is that like…a computer joke? For Jim Jimin...in..minin...”

“What?” Sammy asked again. “No, it’s not a joke. Why do you have that weird look on your face?”

“I don’t—I’m not—“ Ben stuttered as he tried (and failed) to school his expression. “Look _,_ I just… I don’t know what that means and I feel dumb.”

“Oh! Okay, that’s no problem, I just didn’t realize. Non-binary means when someone isn’t completely or exclusively male or female. So like if someone has a completely different gender, or if their gender changes, or if they don’t have a gender at all. Now, I’m being rather general since there are a ton of things that fall under non-binary, but that’s the gist.”

Ben’s eyebrows raised dramatically as he took in this new information. “Oh! Huh. I didn’t know that was a thing! That’s pretty cool.”

“Yeah,” Sammy replied, smiling. “I just wanted to be inclusive. Everyone deserves to feel seen.”

Ben grinned back at him. “You’re absolutely right.”

They get back to the phones. Ben is absolutely giddy when he gets to address their non-binary pals too, and a residual... _something_ clung to him after that, present in the increased bounce of his knee and the tap of his fingers. The show continued on and even though Sammy was swept back up into the current of late-night King Falls, he didn’t miss the slight thrum of energy Ben exuded the rest of the night.

~~

A couple of hours later, Ben was still acting oddly. Sammy had been subtly trying to figure out what was going on, but Ben had just brushed off his questions with little “I’m fine!”s and “don’t worry about it!”s. That, of course, only made Sammy worry _more_. They eventually wrapped up the show and went back to their apartment, Sammy still trying to fit the puzzle together in his mind as he started making breakfast. Usually, they would chat while he cooked, sometimes about the show they just finished, sometimes just about random things like who they thought the Dark might be (Sammy’s money was still on Pete Meyers). Today, though, Ben was worryingly quiet, staring at something in the middle distance and tapping his hands absentmindedly. 

He was thinking about something, that much was certain. Ben did the same thing when Emily was abducted. And when he found out about Jack. Sammy hadn’t seen Ben this way in a while, though, probably not since...well, since he tried to disappear into the void. 

He poured the eggs onto a plate and glanced at Ben, who was sitting at the counter with the same far off look in his eyes. Sammy’s eyebrows furrowed as he turned back to the pancakes. What was eating at his best friend?

He mulled it over in his mind as he finished up there and moved on to the toast. It had to be about something big, right? If it wasn’t, Ben would’ve clued him in by now. Was it about Sammy himself? Was that why Ben didn’t want to tell him? That would make the most sense, wouldn’t it? Sammy bit his lip and moved the plates over to the other side of the counter, trying to ignore the pit that opened in his stomach.

When Ben didn’t notice Sammy was sitting next to him, or even that he was finished, he placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Hey, Ben? It’s time to eat, buddy.”

Ben blinked and looked at him in confusion, then down at the food, only just now recognizing that it was there. “Oh,” he said. “Sorry, I—I didn’t realize.”

They gathered food onto their plates. Ben still had that far off look in his eyes, but he seemed more present now that he was eating.

After a moment, Sammy asked, “Are you okay, Ben?”

“What?” Ben asked thickly through a mouthful of pancakes. He swallowed and shot Sammy a strange look. “Yeah, dude. I’m fine.” He laughed slightly, taking another bite. “Why do you keep asking me that?”

“It’s just, you’ve basically been living in your thoughts for the last few hours and I’m starting to get worried.” _Well_ , Sammy thought, _I’ve actually been worried for a while, but still._

A flash of _something_ crossed Ben’s expression. “Oh. That’s not--don’t worry about that, Sammy. I’ve just been thinking about something, it’s not important.”

“Is it…” He tried to swallow the fear in his voice. “Is it something _I_ did?”

“ _What_ ?” Ben exclaimed, making Sammy flinch slightly. “ _No_ , no, nothing like that--”

Sammy’s gaze anxiously flicked to Ben’s, not quite believing his words, but Ben just looked surprised. He hopped off his chair and wrapped his arms around Sammy in a swift motion, pressing Sammy to his chest.

“I’m _so_ sorry I made you think that,” Ben said in a rush, trying to push every ounce of emotion into his words. “You did nothing wrong, buddy, believe me. This is all about me, I swear. I didn’t even realize anyone would notice, but of course you did,” he said with a little laugh. “You’re my best friend, you can always tell when something’s up.” He paused for a moment. “Have I really been _that_ spacey?”

Sammy chuckled a little and Ben’s heart warmed at the sound. “You didn’t even notice when The Dark and The Dirt _literally_ tumbled across the road in front of us on the drive home.”

Ben’s heart swelled when Sammy said _home_ like it was the most natural thing in the world--because _of course_ it was his home, Ben loved reminding him of that--but the thought was pushed to the back burner when he processed the rest of the sentence. He loosened his grip on Sammy a bit so they could see each other. “You’re joking.”

“I wish I was,” Sammy said gravely, clearly fighting a smile. “Thankfully, they managed to roll out of the way in time, but I doubt they noticed they were in the street in the first place.”

“Wow,” Ben said. “I really must’ve been out of it. That sounds hilarious.”

“Yeah, nothing like seeing two adult men in spandex and cloaks wrestle on the street at 6 am. Why were those two still up, anyway? You’d think they would need to go to sleep at some point, right?”

Ben snorted. “A hero’s work is never done, Sammy.”

Sammy rolled his eyes, but in an extremely fond way. “Yeah, let’s go with that.”

Ben exhaled softly, wrapping his arms more tightly around his best friend and resting his chin on top of his head. “I promise I’ll let you know what’s going on with me as soon as I figure it out.”

The tension in Sammy’s body started to lessen. “Alright,” he murmured. “I love you. Remember that.”

“I love you too, Sammy.”

“And you can _always_ come talk to me about _anything_ , day or night.”

“I know.”

They stayed that way for a minute more, then Ben reluctantly released his hold and went back to his own chair so they could eat. And if he pushed the chair so it was flush against Sammy’s? Well, that was perfectly fine with them both.

~~

A few days passed and, on one especially clear night, Ben suggested they go out and stargaze before their show started. Sammy agreed, so he grabbed a blanket and Ben grabbed some snacks and they walked the forest path by their apartment until they reached the clearing they normally went to. It was spring, so the grass was thick and provided a bit of a cushion below their blanket. A slight breeze drifted through the trees, making the warm air actually quite comfortable as they looked up at the sky.

“Hey, Sammy?”

“Yeah?”

“You know how I’ve been acting kinda weird the past few days?”

Sammy turned to look at Ben, a smile playing on his lips. “It’s crossed my mind, yes.”

“Well…” Ben was looking anywhere but Sammy, his arms wrapped protectively around himself. “I think I might be non-binary.”

Sammy turned fully toward Ben now, resting his head on his arm. “Oh.”

“It all started that night you explained what it was. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, the concept was so interesting and I guess it sorta resonated with me, if that makes sense?” His friend swallowed, still avoiding his gaze. “I...don’t know if I have a gender. When I think about it, it just feels like a _void_. I had always just assumed I was a boy because everyone else said I was, I never stopped to really think about it until that night a few days ago.” He sniffed, and Sammy realized Ben was crying, tear tracks reflected the moonlight.

Sammy scooted over and pulled his best friend into his arms. “I think that’s wonderful, Ben. Thanks for telling me.”

“I was kinda afraid to tell you,” Ben admitted, choking out a laugh. He curled into the hug, making himself smaller.

“I’ll always support you,” Sammy said, rubbing his back. “No matter what. Your identity will never change that.”

Ben looked up. Tears were still streaming down his face, but now he had a wobbly smile. “Thank you,” he said simply, burying his face into Sammy’s sweatshirt.

“Of course, buddy.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Neither of them moved for a while, just enjoying the pressure and warmth of another person as they laid peacefully on the ground. This time, Sammy was the one to break the silence. 

“Have you thought about pronouns yet?”

“Kinda? Not a lot. I’ll get back to you on that.”

“Fair enough,” Sammy said. “Have you told anyone else?”

Ben shook his head. “No, not yet. I figured tonight would be a sort of trial run and I could go from there.” Ben stiffened suddenly and cursed under his breath.

“What’s wrong?” Sammy asked immediately. “You’re shaking.”

“I—I just realized I have to come out to Emily. What if…” he trailed off, grasping Sammy’s sweatshirt tighter. “What if she breaks up with me? I can’t—I don’t think I could deal with that, Sammy.”

“I don’t think that’s even a possibility. She loves you, she wouldn’t break up with you, _especially_ not over something like this.”

“Yeah but she’s _straight_ , Sammy! As in _heterosexual_. As in she likes _boys_.”

“I know what heterosexual means, Ben,” Sammy laughed. “What I’m saying is Emily fell in love with _you_. It doesn’t matter what gender you are, she will love you no matter what. Plus, do you even know for a fact that she’s straight?”

Ben’s eyebrows furrowed. “Well, no.”

“ _Exactly_ ,” Sammy said as he ran his hand through Ben’s hair. “It’ll be okay. You have nothing to worry about, bud.” 

Ben sighed, much less tense now. “Okay. You’re probably right.”

“I probably am.”

“Thanks. You’re the best, Sammy.”

Sammy smiled. “I learned it all from you.”


End file.
